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Ol' Remus recommends
Mental tuneups without the trepanning
Charge of the right brigade
The reader's smorgasbord
You want fries with that kick in the arse?
* * * * *
Liberalspeak
You're about to be lied to by a Liberal when they say ...
growing support for
mounting opposition to
the reality is
the larger question is
the more important question is
the bigger issue is
our nation's children
linked to
touched by
raising awareness
on some level
a new study shows
in denial
marginalized
the American People
sends a message
reaching out
inappropriate
off our streets
history shows
the failed ...
greater diversity
disenfranchised
people of color
social injustice
most vulnerable
disproportionately
economically disadvantaged
oppressed minorities
the struggle for
solidarity with
working families
underserved populations
diverse backgrounds
too many
too often
a positive step
non-partisan, non-profit
speaking truth to power
making a difference
statistics show
emerging consensus
a poll by the highly respected
reaffirm our commitment to
voicing concern
are speaking out
giving voice to
. . . . .
King
Martin Luther King Jr. spoke the truth. Nobody really judges a person soley by the color of their skin, at least nobody we'd want to know. You will never meet a black person who thinks of themselves as a white person with dark skin, and that's as it should be, King was right when he said we should judge people by the content of their character.
So let's do some judging.
Most of us form entirely reasonable opinions by observing ordinary things about people. For instance, are they considerate, courteous and pleasant or are they crude, obnoxious and confrontational? Do they dress to an acceptable standard, or wear offensive costumes? Who are their friends and what are they like? Are they and their family well thought of, or are they no-accounts or in trouble with the law?
Are they honest and dependable, or untrustworthy and unreliable? Are they reasonably intelligent and inquisitive, or deviously clever and ignorant by choice? Are they sociable and cooperative, or consumed with self interest? Can they disagree agreeably, or do they resort to insults and threats? Do they join in the daily banter with good humor, or does it become a big deal if they're not treated with rigid deference?
Are their kids respectful and well behaved, or foul-mouthed street thugs? Do they value education, or do they imagine schools are free but annoying day camps? Are they self-reliant, or does the world owe them a living? Do they take personal responsibility, or do they blame others? Do they overcome obstacles with extra effort, or rant at every little inconvenience? Do they give others the benefit of the doubt, or do they see others as cunning victimizers?
Are they truthful about their personal history, or is it a pastiche of self-serving fantasy? Do they actually work for a living, or fill some political correctness quota? Do they plan for the future, or are they grab and run opportunists? Do they earn respect, or demand it? Do they believe race can be irrelevent, or do they believe race is the "real" reason for all their problems in life?
King had it exactly right, judging people by the content of their character is sensible and just. We should do more of it.
Note to readers - ol' Remus has been a bit busy so this is adapted from Woodpile Report issue 8.
. . . . .
Breaking eyewitness opinion
Other folks have a few words for you tooThings are never what they seem. Pretty much everybody knows the government is hiding something with their, ahem, 'adjusted' statistics and that credit is cinched down tight, but most haven't seen this troubling list of businesses that are closing down, or know that CitiGroup and Merrill Lynch may not be solvent. more
Instead of building on his popularity with the press and self-selected illuminati, Senator Obama reveals himself as a clueless, grasping bumbler the likes of which we haven't seen since Dan Quayle. more
A popular Liberal writer, banned from the hard-left Daily Kos for writing about the John Edwards scandal, lets 'em have it with both barrels. The column includes links to his objectionable columns. more
Stuff you may want to think about
Property values are falling everywhere — but wait, one kind of property keeps going up. Farmland is up almost nine per cent from last year. Farming equipment is selling briskly, fertilizer and seed, all selling well. Here's what's going on. more
Somehow we missed this one last month. A great article by Rob Peebles over at Prudent Bear about how the rich are doing these days. more
12,700 years ago the wind patterns over Europe suddenly changed and the climate toppled over into the Arctic-like Younger Dryas Cold Period. The wind patterns changed, not the Gulf Stream. And suddenly means within half a year. more
It's just the way it was
Telluride, in southwest Colorado, 1940. The truck, an International loaded with ore from a gold mine, is barreling along a one-lane road with blind curves and steep grades. Note the bad rear tires, the single windshield wiper and the access hole for a hand-crank. We're guessing it's got no A/C either.
Telluride, know locally as T-Ride, is a tiny town in a valley with Bridal Veil Falls at one end. Butch Cassidy once robbed a bank there. Today it's a "trust funder resort" featuring skiing, kayaking, hang gliding, film and music festivals. And that's just the stuff they admit to.
World War II Poster.
A Public Health Service-Federal Security Agency recruiting poster from 1943.
Another fine mess
Ol' Remus's Pappy came trouping in mid-day with a bulgin' possible bag slung over his shoulder and his .22 rimfire over t'other. Knowing the beech were uncommon heavy this year and other mast plentiful too, this could mean only one thing. Squirrels.
Ol' Pappy's got a deadeye on him, uses an old-style peep rear and globe front, takes 'em as head shots, often in midair as they're looping from tree to tree iffen he's in a mood to show off. This time he had three greys and two fox squirrels.
Well now, ol' Remus fixes a mean mess of squirrel and he's not at all unhappy to have the makings dropped in on him, so he set to it right off. Ol' Pappy had 'em already cleaned and dressed, natch, so Remus made a batch of coating from flour, salt 'n pepper and ginger and a bit of root stock.
Pappy settled into the chair nearest the window and admired ol' Remus's gate-leg table, solid butternut it was, with about a hundred year's worth of dings and dents. It could be traced back in the family to the late 1800's where it was mentioned in a letter as "our old butternut gate-leg" that "grandmama had liked so well".
One leg had gotten punky from being stored outside a spell and had to be replaced. The whole thing had been refurbished at the same time, sanded lightly and refinished with tung oil. That woulda been 'bout seventy years ago.
"Remus, y' never did tell me 'bout just why it was you left your job out there in Detroit city."
"Well Pappy, lottsa reasons, like how where I lived out Inkster way was changing so much, and how the pretzel business was just getting too complicated. Time was, it was simple."
Remus cut up the squirrels into pieces with his big kitchen knife from Chicago, rolled 'em around so they coated up on all sides and set to browning 'em in cracklin' hot corn oil.
As much as he downplayed it, folks back home insisted on bein' impressed at ol' Remus's having a career in the airline trade. Word got out he had a policy dispute with folks at the very highest level, which impressed 'em even more being as how they had no idea what a policy dispute might be.
"One day," he continued, "the franchise manager for outten Concourse B said as how I had to prioritize. Said he would settle for two or three priorities but four would be even better in case he had to strike one out."
Ol' Remus turned the pieces over in the browning pan, then:
"And I said as how I already prioritized. There's that what I'm doing. And on the other hand, there's that what I'm not doing. That's two, right there."
The pieces properly browned, it was into his cast iron Dutch oven with 'em along with most of a cup of water. Ol' Remus's place was known for its sweet water. Folks say being highest up the hill he was the first to draw offen it so he got the choicest part.
On the side he got a batch of corn bread goin' and set out a clutch of vine-ripened 'maters and fresh-pulled carrots.
Ol' Pappy set his hand to his chin, as was his way. "Seems reasonable to me Remus. A fair man would accept that and be done with it. On t'other hand, maybe you coulda offered up another priority just to sweeten the deal."
"'Spose I coulda told him a third one, like, prioritizing goes to the bottom of the priority list. Kinda reminds me of the demise of set theory. But anyway Pappy, he got right off what I was tellin' him. What I was not doing was thinking up priorities the same time as I was running a pretzel stand."
The nice thing about squirrel, it's fast food, doesn't take much more'n a couple hours. Not like 'possum where folks trap 'em and feed 'em milk and cereal for a week'n a half before they even do 'em out.
Ol' Remus lifted the lid to check one last time and, seeing that it was all simmering like it ought, folded himself up into a chair and fired up his pipe.
"Seems folks in the city get up early and stay up late just figuring ways to make things complicated," he continued. "Sophisticated, they call it. A person oughtta do things 'round t'other way, keeping things simple that are simple and making things simple that aren't."
"Folks out there trip over stuff wasn't even there the day before, 'til they put 'em there. Meanwhile what's gotta get done waits its turn further and further back in line."
Outside the window Remus saw the clouds were hanging lower and lower. Groundfog was forming over the swales. Just the sort of evening ol' Pappy responded to, melancholy made tactile. Ol' Pappy had come to suspect the good in a man's life is transitory; the bad, cumulative.
"Pointless chaos don't even strike 'em as chaos if it's documented proper. No Pappy, they're off someplace of their own making. I don't know where, and I don't 'specially want to. It wasn't my place."
Remus was settin' the table in his usual way, nice 'n neat and attractive. He always figures a meal, no matter how simple the fare, deserves a proper setting.
"Miss Alde says mathematics is mainly taking complicated numbers and boilin' it down to simpler numbers," he continued. "From time to time she thinks of maybe giving her students the answer and having 'em work backwards to the question. The most complicated question would get the best mark. That way they'd be prepared for real life, you see. "
Ol' Pappy could just hear, 'way off in the distance, a melodic air horn announcing the evening coal drag winding its way through the hollow and he got to remembering the steam locomotives of old, most often doubled and tripled up, with rhythmic exhaust blasts that could knock down walls, steam and sweet-smelling coal smoke shootin' straight up into the sky, whistles bellowing like wounded dinosaurs. They was the closest man has ever come to creating life.
Those old train whistles set dogs off to howlin', and dogs even further out would get to howlin' at them, and on it went 'til the county was dogs howlin' from one end to t'other.
"Y'know, Pappy, I agree a person's gotta be organized and better himself but he shouldn't spend all his time wishin' things were some other way."
Ol' Pappy was remembering when once, late of a crisp fall afternoon, he had a nice buck deer anglin' in at him when the howlin' started. Now, that buck was in no actual danger yet he tensed all up an' scanned all 'round then slunk away to a hidey-hole.
The primeval sound of canine howlin' intimidated some ancient part of ol' Pappy's mind too. Somewhere, somewhere deep, we all have a set of prey skills. He gripped his .45-70 Springfield just a little tighter and figured just what direction they'd come from. Maybe that low spot over there by the little pond ...
" ... don't you agree, Pappy?," said Remus as he readied the serving tray for the table.
"Sorry Remus, my mind wandered off there." Spying the empty plates on the table in front of him: "Mm mmm, a mighty fine meal. Yes sir, that was a mighty fine meal indeed."
Note to readers - ol' Remus has been a bit busy so he adapted Another fine mess from Woodpile Report issue 2.
* * * * *
Zeke and The Bad Economy
Part II of III - The Preparations
“Remus?”
“Come in Zeke”
“What'cha doin'? Got a minute?”
“Jest relaxin' between naps, Zeke. Gotta take care of the important thin's in life first.”
“That's what I gotta talk to you ‘bout.”
“Relaxin' or naps? I got em both figur'd good now.”
“No. Important thin's in life, like money.”
“Money is important, Zeke, but not real important. Lots of other thin's beat it."
Zeke tells Remus about his conversation with Bill and Bill's concern for the effects of the bad economy on the way people will act.
Remus lights his pipe, checks to see if the bowl has the right amount of red before he flicks out the flame on the little stick used to light the pipe, carefully placing the stick next to the fireplace for the next time he needs it, sits back in his arm chair and looks at Zeke and says, “Bill's right, you know. If you were hungry an' yer fam'ly was hungry what would you do, Zeke?”
“Whatever I hadda.”
“So would other folk. Would ya kill folks for food, Zeke?”
“Nope.”
“Have ya ever been hungry, Zeke? Not likes ya missed a meal hungry, I mean like ya ain't ate for two weeks hungry.”
“Nope.”
“I was when I had a bad two weeks with the young men campin' on my survival trip. It was cold, weren't many animals out to catch, none went in our traps, ground was so froze we could'n dig fer roots an' grubs; two of the men broke their knives try'n. We jest got hungrier an' hungrier. Some of the men ate bark off'n the young trees. I told them it would'n help, but they ate it anyway. When yer that hungry, Zeke, yer mind changes. You got no friends. You would only thinks ‘bout the fam'ly relyin' on ya, an' ya almost forgets them too, cuz ya only thinks about bein' hungry yerself. The only thin' what saved us was the cold. It was almost worse bein' cold than it was bein' hungry, an' we needed each nuther to keep us from freezin'. We huddled in a bunch, each lookin at the other as a possible dinner, but dare not hurt that feller cuz he was helpin' keep ever'body warm.”
Remus puffs his pipe to restore the fire and continues, “That's how folks with no money is gonna act, Zeke. Problem is, all us on the trip was related an' would'n hurt no other cuz of that, even though some thought of it. Maybe iff'n we was hungry for three or four weeks we wudda ate one of the other. Them flatland folks don't know us, Zeke. They only knows we got food an' they needs some. They won't think twice ‘bout hurtin' us iff'n it would feed them an' their fam'lies. Same as for the other stuff whats they might need. Iff'n we got it an' they need it they will try to take it. Animal nature takes over when a man needs somethin' for his fam'ly an' the only way he can get it for them is to steal an' even kill iff'n that's the only way.”
“Yer scarin' me Remus.”
“Should be scared, Zeke. It's a bad situation.”
“What can we do to protect ourselves?”
“Already did it, Zeke. We live in the hills. Flatland folks knows we don' have much money an' fig'r we prob'ly don' have nuff food to make the long trip worthwhile. We should be safe right here. Bill is who should worry. He's right in the middle of the trouble an' is marked for the first trouble, seein' he's got a nice house an' prob'ly lots of food an' money inside, an' he's right close by them whats need those things. But here are two things we should do”, and Remus, hearing the kettle, goes to the stove to pour himself a cup of tea.
Earl Grey prob'ly. Always drinks that, thinks Zeke, Don't know how grown men can drink that stuff without a lot of corn mash liquor. Tea was made for grammas an' other old frail folks.
“Would you like a cup, Zeke?”
“No thanks, Remus. Um, smells good though.”
“First.”, says Remus, after sitting in his chair again and adjusting the tea cup and pipeholder in just the right position for easy arm movement, “we have to find a ‘bug-out' place for Bill.”
“What's a ‘bug-out' place?”
“That's a safe place where Bill can go if things are looking bad where he lives. It has to be already set up for him to stay there until it's safe to go back.”
“You said we was safe here, so Bill can stay with me an' Aby.”
“That's nice of you, Zeke. How long can he stay at your cabin?”
“Long as he needs to. Even a month if he got'sta.”
“The problems could last for two, three, maybe four year. Bill would have to stay someplace that long. Could he stay in your cabin that long, Zeke?”
“ What? I ain't even been with Aby that long! That's a long time, Remus! I was even thinkin' I would haf'ta get more likker for a month's stay. Bill drinks a lot , an' eats fancy food too. In four year time I would prob'ly be at Bill's throat, me chokin' one side an Aby chokin' the other.”
“That som'thin' ya gots to think ‘bout, Zeke. Either help Bill or let the wolves tear him apart.”
“I would help him, of course. What's the second thin' we gotta do?”
“Second, you gotta get ready with supplies for that amount of time. The supplies have to last as long as the trouble does.”
“How ya gonna keep meat, eggs, an' milk for four year, Remus?”
“We have that stuff here in the hills, Zeke. You don't gotta stock up on those thin's. You gotta stock up on whats ya buy in the city, cuz later on it won' be there to buy, an' ya won' want to go to the city anyway or ya'll git robbed. The stuff ya gotta stock up on is what ya buy in the city now… just buy four years worth next time yer in the city.”
“That's a lot of stuff, Remus. Where does ya think I'm gonna put it?”
“In the yer cabin, yer barn, an' yer shop. Last time I was there you was only usin' half that space… the bottom half. Come here an' look at my second Pantry.”
Remus takes Zeke to a big room behind his Pantry where there are shelves all the way to the ceiling with stuff Zeke never seen before.
“What are these, Remus? Looks like old dried up canned fruit without the juice. Looks awful.”
“You know what these is, don'cha?” as Remus holds up some dried beef and what looked like a cookie”
“Course. That's jerky and hardtack.”
“I did the same to the fruit'n veg'bles. Jest dried it. Could last for years now. Here. Try some.”
“Tastes dry…now it's gittin chewy like taffy…Hey! Now it tastes jest like a apple. That's amazing. Like it came alive in my mouth.”
“Jest add water an all these thin's come back like they was. Without the water they stay waitin' for years.”
“Why does you need this stuff, Remus? You already said food was no problem in these parts.”
“Someday we may have a snow storm like the History books said we had ‘bout ninety five year ago. Folks could'n get outta the cabins for weeks. Iff'n that happens again you'll find me right here eatin' this stuff an bringin' in wood jest on the other side of this wall through this lil door, whats swings in , cuz it wouldn' be able to swing out. Food an' heat is all I would need till things got better.”
“I gotta go, Remus, a'fore you git to talkin' ‘bout floods an' earthquakes an' start showin' me room after lil room how ya is prepared for that too. Hey! Did'n ya have nuttin to eat them two weeks in the woods?”
“Found a squirrel's nest in a tree. Climbed the tree an' got two squirrels in the nest. They was half asleep an' did'n knows nuff to be afraid. All we hadda do was slit their throats and throw em in boilin' water. Was only five days into the trip an' no one wanted to kill em, cuz they was so helpless…not likes they was runnun' as usual an' had a fightin' chance. We let em go. Later we was mad we did that.”
Zeke thanks Remus for the information, says he'll have to think about Bill staying for four years, and leaves.
-.-.-.-
Zeke finishes telling Aby about what Remus said and they are both sitting in the kitchen looking down.
“Four years is a long time, Zeke.”
“Not as long as we will have together in the future, Aby. Four years compared to that is not long.”
Aby looks up at Zeke and says, “Bill and I never argued . We actually got along fine. But he is fifteen years older than I am. He got married when I was ten. He looked after me until I was a young girl and then I was off to college. I really don't remember knowing him as I would get to know him in four years living in these close quarters. Father had a big house, but only a little bigger than our cabin. Bill has a huge house and might go crazy in this one so much smaller. But he is my brother who would do anything for me. I think we should offer it to him, and, if he accepts, we get prepared for one more person here, should that be necessary. Bill's children Marge and Charlie are in college and should be safe where they are, so we don't have to figure three more. What do you think, Zeke?”
“I agree. Bill has done everythin' he could for us, even bringin' us together in the first place. Me'n him would prob'ly end up hating each nuther by the time he leaves, but he would be safe and alive to hate me nuther day”, and Zeke smiles.
Aby gets up and gives Zeke a hug, saying, “Thank you.”
-.-.-.-
“So that's what we been thinkin' might happen. Course we's thinkin' the worst case, but iff'n it happens we wants to be ready. Whats ya think? Wanna have us ready to keep ya safe for four years”, asks Zeke sitting in Bill's office.
“Four years, Zeke? That's a long time”, says Bill sitting forwards in his high back chair.
“Shore is. ‘specially for two men whats used to rulin' the roost, but Remus says it may take that long.”
“Good way to put it, Zeke. I don't suppose two roosters would get along in the same pen. But the situation is a little different here. I know the hen is yours and we both know I don't want to change that. What would you like to see me do, Zeke?”
“I would like you to be safe, and I'm offerin' you a way.
Bill looks squarely at Zeke and says, “Zeke. I'm going to say ‘ok'”
Zeke smiles and says, “I told Aby we would prob'ly hate each nuther after four years, but at least you would still be around to hate me.”
Tears well up in Bill's eyes and he says, “Zeke. That was a test to see how far you would go to help me. You would risk everything you own to keep me safe. I cannot tell you how that makes me feel. You never said I would have to do anything for your protection nor did you say I would have to pay anything. My own father gave me what you are offering, but I had to work in his factory in return. Why would you do so much for me?”
“Yer fam'ly, Bill.”
“Yes I am. I am a member of the greatest family ever”, and Bill couldn't hold his emotions any longer, lowered his head in his arms and quietly cried.
Zeke feels uncomfortable with Bill crying and says, “Aby was happy when she came into the fam'ly, but she did'n know us as well as you does now. I guess you have a right to cry.”
Bill raises his head, chuckling, and wipes his tears.
“How ya gonna be safe, Bill. Iff'n thin's get so bad ya can't stay here.”
“I have a “Bug-out” place set up in the Bahamas . It costs a lot of money to get there and a lot of money to live there, but otherwise it's cheap. I would be happy there for four years. It's a paradise. Now I would like to offer you and Aby and your children, however many you have at the time, to join me there as long as is required…no, make that as long as you would like to stay”, and Bill, with a bigger smile, adds, “You have family in the Bahamas now, Zeke. You should visit them now and then.”
“How ya gonna keep yer house an' factory safe, Bill?”
“Some of my employees offered to watch the buildings for the pay they are getting now. I feel uncomfortable with that. If they don't like me, or they like the angry ex-employees better, I would come back to rubble. So I talked to professional security companies. Their price is higher. I asked them if they were good. They said ‘yes', of course. So I asked them what the odds were that I would come back to unharmed buildings. Of course they said no harm would come to the buildings. So I said, ‘Put that in writing and back it up with an insurance policy from a reputable insurance company covering the value of the buildings and you got a deal.' They said it would cost one hundred dollars a year more for the coverage. Now I don't care what happens. If I return to an intact building I just go on as usual. If I come back to rubble, I have a big check waiting. Either way I'm covered.”
Bill continues, “Now, Zeke, you gave me the idea I was looking for. You gave me a product I can sell … dried food. Ask Remus if he would tell us how he does that so you and I can develop a method for mass production of dried food. Everyone would buy it to have food for the emergencies such as power-outs, snow storms, car break-downs limiting trips to the grocery store, while not mentioning possible riots or bad economies, letting the people think of those reasons on their own. I could bring back all my people to start that product, maybe even helping to stop the bad economy. Think Remus would help us?”
“Ever heard of Earl Grey tea, Bill?
“Yes. I like that tea.”
“I'll tells Remus you wants to talk ‘bout somethin' over a cup of Earl Grey tea. He'll be here in a flash an' tells ya anythin' ya wants to know. Iff'n ya gets him one of them new Zippo lighters ya won't even haf'ta pay em. Remus likes things better'n money. That's why ever'body likes Remus. For a trinket he solves yer problems an' goes away happy, leavin' folks thinkin' they still owe em. Remember that two dollar book I give him for solvin' that electrical problem whats saved me hundreds? He still thinks I overpaid him while I knows I underpaid him.”
-.-.-.-
“Bahamas! Zeke! Do you know where that is ”, asks Aby.
“Bill said it cost a lot of money to get there, so it's prob'ly far away.”
“It's near the equator . It has seasons of Spring, Summer, Spring and Summer! It's never cold there, Zeke. It's the most beautiful place in the world! I would love to go there!”
“It's Bill's bug-out place, Aby. He ain't even goin' there unless problems happen here.”
“Maybe when the economy gets better we can go there for a couple weeks.”
“How many vacations has Bill ever taken, Aby?”
“None. He's always too busy working.”
“When the economy gets better will Bill be goin' to the Bahamas ?”
“Noooo. Oh gosh, Zeke. We will never get to go to the Bahamas . I always wanted to go to the Bahamas .”
“You always wanted a big fam'ly, an' I'm givin' that to you. Maybe I can do somethin' ‘bout the Bahamas too.”
“My body will look so bad in a bathing suit by the time I have my babies and get to the Bahamas .”
“You will always look good to me, Aby”, and Zeke gets a kiss, while he wonders if he promised too much this time. . . . .
In the next Woodpile Report:
Zeke and The Bad Economy
Part III of III - The First Flatlander arrives
* * * * *
